


Just Us Now

by Writingwife83



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fix-It, Friendship/Love, Romance, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Spoilers, Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:47:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 19,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21984667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writingwife83/pseuds/Writingwife83
Summary: When the battle is over, Rey is tasked with getting herself and an unconscious Ben Solo safely off Exegol. But what happens when the dust settles? It’s not easy for an ex Supreme Leader to turn over a new leaf and start fresh. Add in the possibility for the former rivals to explore long repressed feelings, and things can become even more complicated.
Relationships: Finn/Rose Tico, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Zorii Bliss/Poe Dameron
Comments: 193
Kudos: 370





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! I’m jumping on the bandwagon like a million others and writing a fix it fic after seeing TROS last week lol. (Side note- I actually enjoyed the movie, but still who doesn’t want to see Ben Solo alive and well and enjoying some awkward romance?) This is my very first Reylo creation and I’m super excited to continue it. Hope you enjoy! ;)

Before that blissful moment, Rey might have questioned if his lips even knew how to lift in such a way. She’d never seen anything quite like it. Understandable, of course. None of their past encounters merited such a reaction. But now that she’d seen it- been the cause of it- Rey instantly wondered how she’d managed to get by all this time without such a devastatingly beautiful sight. 

But just as euphoria set in, that was the moment Ben’s smile began to fall, eyelids drooped, and the grip of his solid arms softened around her as he fell backwards before she could fully stop him.

“Ben!” 

Rey leaned over him, panic mounting as she took hold of his shoulders and gave him a little shake. She moved one hand to cradle his now stilled features as her other found his wrist and pressed against the cool flesh in hopes of feeling any tiny little beat.

And then she felt it.

Rey released an unsteady breath, leaning down to let her check rest against his chest in relief. The slow and gentle thumping against her cheek reinforced the comfort of his pulse against her fingertips, and for a quiet moment she stayed like that, content just to know he was living and breathing. That was enough.

But it was only a matter of time before the chaotic noises above reminded her of where she truly was, and what had just happened. What was still happening, to some degree, despite their victory. 

Rey lifted her eyes to the sky, knowing that she needed to get off Exegol and back to Ajan Kloss. But then her eyes fell downward again...to the especially large figure who apparently wasn’t planning to regain consciousness any time soon.

“Ben,” she tried again. “We’ve got to get out of here. Come on, please wake up!”

She sighed, glancing around, even though there was nothing and nobody there that would be of any use.

“If you don’t get up, I’m going to have to move you myself,” Rey said with a little shake of her head, her tone not unlike one used on a difficult little child who refused to listen to their parent. 

If only he were the size of a child, she mused.

Rey stood slowly, feeling as though she hadn’t done so in days. Everything truly felt new. 

She took a breath and let it out steadily, staring at Ben on the ground and gathering her strength. She’d halted and manipulated a transport flying through the air...surely this would be nothing. 

Rey picked up the fallen lightsabers and secured them on her belt before stepping back and reached out to where Ben lay, shutting her eyes and pulling him up and towards her. As she slowly opened her eyes again, she was greeted by the welcome sight of him hovering above the ground. Just a few inches, but it was a start. 

With a bit more concentration, Ben’s body lifted further from the ground and Rey began gingerly making her way toward the now rubble filled hallway. She moved Ben ahead of her, watching where he was going and following closely behind, stepping over fallen stones as well as the Knights of Ren.

She could tell there was so much about that day that her mind was desperate to process and focus on, questions that demanded answers, but she fought against them. This was not the time. All her strength needed to be put towards simply getting them both to safety. 

She knew she needed to get back to her transport, and she hoped that she could just go back the way she had come; the platform was still at her level just ahead. She was beginning to feel the exhaustion of using so much of her energy and keeping Ben just off the ground was sapping her quickly. 

Rey stepped onto the platform beside Ben, groaning inwardly at the fact that there didn’t seem to be a power source that was functional and without it, she’d have to be the one to lift them. She summoned all her focus and strength, shutting her eyes and slowly lifting her hands in the air, coaxing the platform to move.

A loud rumble and they lifted several inches...but then she felt herself slip, and they crashed back to the ground.

Rey lost her balance, nearly falling off completely and then desperately grabbing Ben’s body in hopes he wasn’t going to fall off as well. She stopped for a moment, kneeling next to him and catching her breath, staring up in despair at how far she’d have to take them both. 

Instead of looking up though, she shifted her gaze to him, focusing on his peaceful face and how badly she wanted to quite literally carry him to safety. She just wanted to be away from all of it, but what if she wasn’t strong enough?

Rey draped an arm over Ben’s torso and laid her head on his chest, as she’d done before, just desperate for a moment of rest and to gather her strength and willpower in order to do what was needed. She might have been imagining it, but his heartbeat felt stronger than it had some minutes before. To think that he was becoming stronger gave her hope for herself. She was just about to push herself up once more and give it another go, despite how insurmountable it seemed.

That’s when the platform began to move.

Rey’s eyes widened as she looked around, holding onto Ben even more tightly. But her shock lasted for only the space of a breath. Almost right away...she knew. A watery smile formed on Rey’s lips as they were safely lifted to the ground level. The safety and care that washed over her in those moments left her in no doubt of what had just happened. Especially when the platform came to a halt, and she heard Leia’s voice as clear as day.

_ “Go now!” _

Rey stood obediently, feeling newly energized, and instantly concentrated to lift Ben from the platform, moving him to solid ground before jumping off herself. The moment that her feet hit solid ground, the platform fell at full force, crashing into pieces on the subterranean level. 

She felt a quick chill rush through her at that sight, whispered a heartfelt thanks to Leia, and then began moving Ben toward their ships.

But just as Rey began to feel that the hard work was done, it dawned on her that neither of these ships were built for two. Considering both options, as much as she hated to leave Luke's X-wing, there was no possible way to cram Ben’s body anywhere into that ship with her in the pilot seat.

Rey set Ben down to open the Tie fighter’s hatch, then lifted him up high and began moving his body in behind the cockpit. The thud of his shoulder hitting the seat made her wince and she tried to change the angle, which only caused another thud, this time his head hitting some controls on the ceiling.

“Sorry,” Rey murmured to herself as Ben’s body came crashing down somewhat haphazardly the last couple feet onto the floor of the fighter.

She climbed in and shut the hatch, unable to avoid a small chuckle at the sight of Ben’s legs draped around the side of the pilots seat. Giving Luke’s X-wing one more glance, with a silent promise to return for it, she started the Tie fighter and took off.

It was at least twenty minutes into the flight that she finally heard a grunt behind her. 

“Ben?” She glanced round the seat a bit, seeing some movement in her peripheral. 

“Rey?”

The sound of her name on his lips, regardless of his voice being so weary and broken, was better than any music she’d ever heard. 

“How am I alive?” he murmured.

“Don’t you remember waking up before?”

“But you’re alive.”

That statement made her frown and she let out a short laugh. “That doesn’t mean you can’t be. What do you mean?”

He paused for a long moment before replying softly. “Nothing...thank you,” he added.

“You don’t have to thank me, Ben,” she countered. “You went there for me. I was leaving with you or I wouldn’t have left at all.”

Silence set in again and a very strange and unfamiliar fear took hold of Rey. She was suddenly struck with the realization that almost everything that she and Ben Solo had shared up to then...was gone. Every encounter they’d shared, at least in person, had been wrapped up in a war, in a conflict. Sometimes they were at odds with each other and sometimes fighting shoulder to shoulder. But either way, to fight for something was all they knew.

Now that the conflict was gone...would there anything else left? 

“Where are we going?”

Rey was grateful for the interruption of her thoughts. 

“Ajan Kloss. It’s where the resistance is stationed.”

She heard him moving around a little, probably shifting to sit upright on the only small ledge that was available. 

“I shouldn’t be going there with you.”

She instantly felt the hesitation, the growing seeds of fear within him once more.

“I’ll explain everything to them,” Rey assured him, turning partly, quickly beginning to hate the fact that she wasn’t really able to fully look at him and doing her best to focus on the light. “They’ll understand once they know what happened.”

“Would you trust me?” he asked simply. “If you were them.”

Rey hesitated, knowing he was right. “Maybe not...right away,” she admitted.

“There’s almost nowhere I can go,” Ben went on. “Nowhere I wouldn’t be recognized and hated, or at least feared. You know that’s true. I didn’t think I’d have to worry about this.”

She narrowed her eyes at those words, but chose not to press for more. 

“There’s a place we could take you,” Rey offered reluctantly. “Until things can be worked out...Tatooine.”

He paused, but she already knew he wouldn’t argue. He said himself his options were limited. If he wanted to lay low, that was one of the few places he could do it.

“Ok.”

Rey nodded, setting a course to the decided upon planet, though she couldn’t help wondering what would happen after that. She’d have to continue on her way to Ajan Kloss after getting him to Tatooine. It wasn’t exactly that she was worried for him, she knew he could likely take care of himself and figure things out. It wasn’t that. It was the simple fact that she just didn’t want to  _ leave him _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, I intended to write a little one shot thing just to “get my feet wet” since I’ve never written for this ship before. Well...that went out the window real quick. XD Idk how many chapters this will be, but I’m plotting out a bunch of stuff with my trusty beta reader and the ideas just keep on flowing! (Any readers from my other fandom already know how that goes with us lol) So if you’re reading this end note, I hope you enjoyed this first chapter and are looking forward to more. If so, please do leave a comment, I’d love to hear from you! :D


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just have to say that one of my favorite things about posting this fic a few days ago was getting comments from some of the readers who have been with me for my sherlolly fics for a long time. I loved seeing familiar names and people who were excited to see me starting to also write for Reylo. Thanks for that! <3

“Your signal is coming from a Tie fighter,” Poe commented, almost the moment Rey established communication.

“It’s a long story, but everything’s ok,” she assured him. “I’ll be back soon. I just had to make a stop first. I wanted to make sure everyone else was ok.”

“We’re good, we’re all good!” Poe confirmed, lifting a bit of the weight from Rey’s shoulders. “I’ll tell everyone you’re safe. We can’t wait to see you.”

She said goodbye and signed off with Poe just before they entered the atmosphere on Tatooine. 

It took Rey a few minutes to realize what she was doing once she was flying lower over the planet. It didn’t even hit her at first that she’d completely passed by the largest town. Her initial plan had been to land somewhere nearby the town, while still keeping the Tie fighter out of view, and ask around for a suitable place where Ben could stay. 

But it was as if she were on auto pilot. Rey bypassed that option and headed straight for the rocky parts of the Tatooine desert, out in the middle of nowhere. Somewhere she was completely unfamiliar with. 

Somehow, it didn’t feel that way.

“Why are you in the Western Dune Sea?”

Rey glanced behind her, brow furrowing. “I...don’t know.”

When she turned to look ahead once again, a structure took shape on the rocky horizon. It looked like a home, it’s exterior blending in well among the rocks.

She felt Ben’s hand grip the side of the seat as he pulled himself forward to get a better view and spoke softly.

“How did you know about this place?”

Rey shook her head. “I didn’t. I didn’t know where I was headed exactly. Why? What is this?”

* * *

Ben’s expression became more serious as they stepped out of the fighter and stood in front of Obi-Wan’s home, his arm draped around Rey’s shoulders for support. This was a man that had spent a very long time believing that the past should stay in the past and even that he had to destroy it to become something better. It had been a long time since Ben Solo had allowed himself to take any sort of leisurely walk down memory lane.

Rey squinted up at him, the desert sun almost instantly becoming oppressive. 

“When did you come here?”

“Luke took me once. Just before I became a student of his.” He began slowly limping forward, with her assistance. “It hasn’t been lived in for years, but Luke used to come here occasionally. At least, before he went into exile.”

“So...you were thinking about this place when we got to Tatooine?”

He looked down at her. “Trying not to, actually.”

She smirked. “You must have been trying not to think of it really loudly.”

Rey helped him inside, taking it all in. It was actually incredibly welcoming. The interior was light and full of life, almost as if it had been inhabited this whole time, since there was almost no sign of the desert having invaded the small structure. 

“You’re gonna need food,” she realized aloud while helping him to take a seat. “I’ll go back to the town. Will you be ok here?”

He kept his eye on her, and for a moment she thought he was going to say no and beg her to stay. 

“I’m fine,” he finally replied. “I’ll check things out while you’re gone. Make sure everything’s working.”

“You really should rest,” Rey urged. “You nearly died today.”

He smiled. “Yeah I know. So did you.” 

* * *

Rey came back through the door of the little home, her arms full with supplies. She had food to last for days and varied personal items, including clothing. The clothing was actually the most challenging part of her search. Ben was impressively tall, and though that was a feature she thoroughly appreciated, it did not make her task an easy one.

Upon crossing the threshold, she instantly realized he was not in the living area where she left him.

“Ben?”

She heard a thump, followed by a muffled reply which seemed to be coming from the kitchen. As she followed the noises, she was greeted by Ben carefully standing up, holding onto the little stove and gesturing to the sink.

“Found some tools and got the water going.” He was clearly a little winded. “I also reset the power generator in the cellar.”

“You’re really good at resting,” Rey commented with a short laugh.

“This is resting,” he countered with a little shrug. “Whole lot easier than leading the First Order.”

“I got lots of things.” She set the bags onto a little table. “This should be enough food to last at least a few days, along with clothes and things. It’ll be enough to last you till I can come back and-“

“You don’t have to do that,” he interjected. “In a few days I’m sure I won’t be hobbling around anymore. I can throw a hood on and venture into town for my own supplies.”

“No, I don’t mind,” she insisted. “I still want to help. I’m not just dropping you off to...leave you alone. I would have taken you to Ajan Kloss if you’d let me.”

“I just don’t want you to-“ He hesitated. “You shouldn’t keep sacrificing...for me.”

Rey thought about launching into a speech about how this wasn’t about sacrifice anymore. It wasn’t about duty or doing the right thing. It was about the connection between them. And she didn’t mean The Force.

But ultimately she decided she wasn’t ready to make that argument. At the very least, not with both of them in the state they were in. 

As she paused in thought, Ben reached into one of the bags of supplies, pulling out a change of clothes.

“See? This should be an effective disguise for me,” he quipped, holding up the garments in shades of tan and brown against his usual black attire.

Rey laughed, crossing the room to him and reaching out to just briefly touch his black tunic, near the tattered hole where she’d subsequently struck and healed him.

“Probably an improvement in some ways.” 

As soon as she’d reached out and spoken, their physical proximity struck her. Standing there, almost toe to toe with him, there was a magnetic pull she couldn’t ignore if she tried. Uncomfortable with any silence, she spoke again.

“So...I think you have everything you need.”

Ben nodded slowly, his eyes suddenly locked onto hers in a way that left her feeling a bit lightheaded. Much of what she’d always experienced under the weight of his gaze was still there. Only the negatives had been removed; the fear, anger, and grief. What was left was just a purified and more pleasant version of that familiar intensity.

“I am coming back,” she added quickly. “I’ll do whatever needs to be done on Ajan Kloss and then I’ll come back here and...see how you are.”

Rey looked away, feeling like running outside and burying her head in the sand.  _ See how you are? _ She was quickly coming to the conclusion that she had absolutely no idea what she was doing. Maybe he didn’t either. Yes they’d risked everything for each other and even shared a brief, passionate moment, but what did that all amount to at the end of the day?

“When?”

Their eyes met again and Rey felt that same intensity hit her. His low spoken question made her breath catch and her heart ache more than a little. It might be true that neither of them knew exactly what they were doing and what this was. But he clearly knew as well as she did, that it was something. Even after his argument that she’d done enough to help him, here he was begging the question of exactly when they’d be together again.

“Really soon,” she whispered. 

It was incredibly subtle, but she could tell he wasn’t sure whether to believe her. Trust likely didn’t come naturally to him. But he was going to have to understand this new sort of conflict she was facing. She had a life, friends, responsibilities, all of which were going to be wholly unconnected to him until he made a very new and different life for himself compared to the one he’d been living. Regardless of any feelings they may have for each other, he was in a sort of limbo, not quite fitting in anywhere yet. It would take time for that to change, and until then Rey would once again be constantly pulled in one direction and the other. 

“As soon as I possibly can,” Rey said more firmly, also understanding that his position was a difficult one and not wanting to make it harder.

To further prove herself, she allowed that magnetic pull to take control and extended her hand, touching her fingers to his and allowing them to gently thread together.

She was absolutely going to keep her word. Nothing in the galaxy would stop her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m honestly having a hard time writing for anyone but these two at the moment. A pretty great AU idea even hit me today! *sigh* I don’t tend to like having a bunch of WIP at once, so I’m definitely digging myself into a hole lol. I reeeeally need to force myself to update at least one of my WIP in my other fandom/ship next before I come back to this one. So if I behave myself lol, I won’t update this fic again quite as quick as I did between ch 1 and 2. Hopefully you’re enjoying my take on these two so far! ;)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the love so far on this fic! I’m feeling not too much like an outsider as I step over into the Star Wars and Reylo fandom. :) This is lots of fun so far! Read on...

“You’re out of your mind.”

Rey stared back at Finn for a moment before glancing at Poe in search of his reaction. Poe only lifted his hands and shook his head.

“I’m with Finn on this one. I gotta say, this is insane!”

“You weren’t there,” she said firmly, looking back and forth between them. “You don’t know the part he played. You didn’t see everything I saw, everything he did.”

“What I’ve seen,” Finn jumped in, “Is Ren trying to  _ kill you _ . Multiple times! He tried to kill me, and Poe, and every friend we have! In addition to the countless innocent people he’s successfully murdered all over the galaxy! How can he have suddenly changed into a different person?”

“He’s not a different person. He’s always been  _ Ben Solo _ , an incredibly powerful Jedi was betrayed by those who loved him, and was led astray during a time of weakness. I don’t think he ever truly wanted the life he’s been living, but it was all he felt he had.”

“And who’s to say he won’t be led astray again?” Poe questioned, crossing his arms.

“By who?” Rey laughed.

“Himself! Maybe all that…” Poe gestured, searching for the right word. “That dark stuff is just sitting in him now, dormant until someone looks at him the wrong way or something!”

Rey’s expression softened into quiet thoughtfulness for a moment. “No...I think all that is gone. He’s just Ben now.”

Finn suddenly tilted his head, frowning at her. “Wait a second, what’s going on with you two?”

Poe’s head whipped back and forth, looking between them both. “Going on? You mean Rey and Ky- Ben? Why would there be anything going on between them?!”

Rey shook her head, glancing away. “There’s nothing,” she replied, instantly realizing it sounded halfhearted. 

Poe stared at her, mouth agape. “Ok now hold on,  _ that _ look I know! I don’t have to have Jedi mind powers! Are you kidding me?! I mean, when did this start?!”

“Relax, it’s nothing,” Rey tried to assure them.

Poe threw his hands up and began pacing, but what Rey noted was the way Finn was staring at her, a horrified but knowing expression on his face.

“It’s not nothing,” he said quietly.

“How are we supposed to trust what you’re telling us about Ben when you’re not looking at things with a clear head?” Poe questioned.

“No, I  _ can _ see him clearly,” she insisted. “I always have. It’s difficult to explain but we’re...connected.”

Poe pinched the bridge of his nose. “Trust me, I don’t want to hear that explained.”

“No, through The Force! We have been, for a long time. Maybe even long before we knew it. I saw things in him just as clearly as I see them in myself. When he was conflicted, but not ready to change, I could see it. Believe me when I tell you that there is no more conflict in him. If you trust me, then please know that you can trust him now as well.”

The two men stared back at her, quite obviously displeased but also realizing that there was nothing more they could say at this point.

“I still don’t think he shouldn’t come here,” Poe added.

“Like I said before, that’s exactly how he feels,” Rey agreed, standing up. “At least for now I think we can all agree he’s better off where he is. And it’s probably better if we all keep this quiet as well, just in case.”

“And you’re planning to go back there, aren’t you?” Finn asked, more concern evident in his eyes. “To Tatooine.”

Rey’s gaze shifted, her lack of reply more than clear to her friends.

“I don’t like this,” Poe said with a grunt of dissatisfaction. He pointed a finger at Rey. “Yes, I trust you...but I still don’t have to like this.”

* * *

Rey shifted restlessly on her cot, the morning sun peeking in through the shelter and right into her line of vision. She’d gotten a minimal amount of sleep during the night, and it was rather broken up. 

She truly was exhausted, so she should have crashed and slept like a baby. In addition to the fight to the death with Palpatine, getting Ben to safety, and getting him settled on Tatooine, she had to go back to Exegol again before returning to Ajan Kloss. Not only was it unthinkable for her to abandon Luke’s X-wing completely, but she also didn’t want to continue to fly and be seen in a Tie-fighter. 

By the less than refreshing morning hours, she had to admit that there was only one explanation for her restlessness, if she were really honest with herself. She was plagued with an undefinable discomfort about leaving Ben on Tatooine. She didn’t mistrust him, she didn’t think he was helpless, and she also knew she’d be returning soon. But somehow she couldn’t shake the little bit of unease, that feeling of something being off. It felt like a piece of herself was missing. 

And then, just like that...

“Rey.”

She sat straight up as Ben came into view across from her.

“Hi.” She pushed some hair out of her face. “It’s um, it’s morning here.”

“It’s evening here,” he replied, eyes glancing around him and then connecting back to hers. “How did it go?”

Rey shrugged. “Not bad.”

He smirked. “But not good either.”

She gathered her blanket a little tighter around her middle, looking down. “I understand why they're concerned, I do. It’s just frustrating because I want to make them see what I see. It’s so clear to me and I wish it was just as clear to them!”

When she looked back up at him, his ghost of a smile turned her insides to mush.

“As long as it’s clear to you,” Ben said softly.

Rey had the instant urge to get up and rush over to him. She thought back to when she left Tatooine a few days before and wanted to slap herself for holding back. In hindsight she wondered why she had. What was the point? Now here she was, not truly in the same place with him and likely to lose the connection they shared at any moment, and she wanted nothing more than to hold him and feel him holding her right back.

“Did you initiate this?” she suddenly thought to ask him. “The connection.”

He pursed his lips. “Not exactly.”

She frowned. “What do you mean, not exactly?”

“I wasn’t really...trying,” he replied critically and cleared his throat. “I was just thinking.”

Rey’s lips spread very slowly. “You mean you were thinking  _ about me _ ? Wait, is that how it always worked? Is that what usually started it?”

“Your decaying grandfather started it,” Ben teased.

She rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean.”

Ben shifted his stance and hesitated. “Ok, yes, sometimes I think that was a factor. Maybe just when I was thinking about you really hard.”

Rey’s brow shot up.

“I mean like when I was  _ trying to find you _ ,” he clarified, a little bit of color visible on his cheeks.

She got up very slowly, hesitant to approach as if it might make him disappear faster. 

“How’s your leg and...everything?” Rey asked softly.

“Better.”

“Good. You look better.”

She could swear she saw his chest rising and falling more rapidly as she drew closer. And instinctively, she just wanted to feel that motion. In the moment she told herself she simply wanted to feel the clear evidence of life as well as see it.

Rey barely hesitated as she placed her hand against his chest where his heart was, watching the way it made him inhale sharply through his nose and then exhale gently through slightly parted lips. 

“Rey,” he murmured, voice a bit unsteady. “When are you-“

“Rey, there’s breakfast if you’re hungry!”

She spun around at the sound of Rose’s voice, wondering if her stance had looked as strange and awkward as she pictured it might have, with her hand hovering in the empty air in front of her.

“Yep, ok thanks, I’ll be right out,” Rey sputtered out, still feeling like she’d just been caught red handed, despite the lack of suspicion on Rose’s features.

“Ok, see you out there,” she replied pleasantly, and quickly took her leave.

Not surprisingly, when Rey turned around again, Ben was gone.

She exhaled, running her fingers roughly through her hair and over her scalp.

“Soon, Ben,” she whispered in reply to his unfinished question. “Trust me, really soon.”

* * *

Ben stepped out into the now breezy, though still hot, Tatooine evening air. He shut his eyes, letting the air rush over his face and through his hair, fully taking in all the things he thought would be long gone for him by now. 

It would have been enough, he thought for the hundredth time. To see her sit up, smile, say his name, and know that she was going to be ok and go on living. He was ready to go in that moment if he had to. He felt content, peaceful, and even fulfilled. But then she had to go and kiss him like that.

The corners of Ben’s mouth lifted just a little as his mind once again ran through the details. 

He admitted to himself that in the moments during their kiss, he did feel a pang of sadness and silently uttered a plea to stay with her. But immediately after they parted, he felt the very same peace come over him. In his eyes, the end result was still well worth the sacrifice. And when he felt himself slipping away, it wasn’t with bitterness and regret, but with happiness. 

Now he’d been given this second chance, this new life he didn’t expect, and he found himself struggling to know exactly what to do with it. Yesterday, fighting and dying were his way to make things right. Today, it was living. He’d barely ever done that in his adult years, so it was hard to know where to start. 

Ben limped slightly out onto the large rock the little home was built into, lowering himself with a bit of difficulty till he sat on the ground with legs crossed.

Shutting his eyes again and breathing, slow and deep, he tried to remember and focus on some of the things he’d long hidden away. Things Master Luke had taught him back when his mind had yet to be fully corrupted. It all felt like a lifetime ago.

But eventually, slowly, he felt himself lift from the ground, hovering comfortably in the age old Jedi tradition of meditation. It felt a little bit like coming home. His mind felt very much at peace, and so clear of distractions.

That is, except for the several times Rey’s face made an appearance. That was a distraction he couldn’t say he was sorry for. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you hoping Rey gets her behind back to Tatooine right quick? Well, so am I lol. Trust me, I’m going to make it happen. Stay tuned! I might try to update my other WIP before I post another chapter in this one, but hopefully it won’t be too long from now. As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts. :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not quite sure how, but I somehow kinda just knew that I was going to end up updating this WIP before my others lol. My continued apologies to my other two WIP! But anyway, if you’re here and you’re reading this right now, likely this is the update you’re currently interested in hearing about. That being said, read on and I hope you enjoy it! ;)

Rey reached her hand out slowly, lifting another rock and moving it into the complex orbiting formation above her head, keeping her eyes shut and focusing intensely. 

Or at least, trying to.

Air moved in through her nose and out slowly through her lips, each respiration carefully controlled as she felt the force flowing through her and around every rock floating through the air. She started to relax, fall into the rhythm of it, and feel stronger.

That is, until she felt his fingers touching hers.

Rey jumped, her eyes flying open as the little rocks fell like rain all around her. She looked around, but no he wasn’t there. It was just a memory, an especially vivid one. 

She exhaled in a puff, hands on her hips as she thought about how this was the fifth day in the course of the week that she didn’t feel like she could complete her exercises. It was discouraging. Shouldn’t she feel stronger than ever now? 

Rey picked up her bag, slinging it over her shoulder and walking slowly from the forest back toward the camp, noting that the sounds of the ever present celebrations seemed to finally dying down. As she came into the clearing, she caught sight of Chewie, working underneath the Falcon. 

“Thanks for that,” Rey said with a smile as she approached, prompting a shrug and brief reply from him. “I know it’s not hard, but I still appreciate it.”

She paused, hoping she wouldn’t upset him but feeling it was only right to give him the option.

“You know, when I do leave, you could come with me to Tatooine...if you want.”

Chewie glanced over his shoulder, continuing to work but slowing a bit at her words. He spoke more softly.

Rey nodded, giving him a pat on the shoulder. “That’s ok, I understand. There’s no rush. You just tell me whenever you’re ready.”

She walked away toward her own tent, wondering if she even should have brought it up. Of those who knew of Ben Solo being alive and turning back to the light, none were more conflicted than Chewie, and understandably so. Perhaps someday he’d be able to sort through his feelings towards the troubled child of his beloved friends Han and Leia. But it was too soon. Rey understood that a good deal of time might be needed to heal this wound.

“Still so lost.”

Rey turned, stopping in her path at the voice of Maz Kanata. 

“Sorry?”

The small woman approached, her expression kind and perceptive. “You still wish to find your place...find yourself. But you will not find that here.”

Rey paused, looking down and giving away some disappointment in herself. 

“I don’t know why I feel so lost now. I’ve done it- gotten answers, helped bring about peace, and ended the Sith. I’m alive to tell the tale and rebuild a peaceful life and somehow I still feel so...incomplete.“

“So does he.”

Rey met the wise old gaze with a little surprise. 

Maz put a finger to her lips in a little _shh_ gesture and then let out a little chuckle. “I know many things!”

“I don’t know what the future holds for him,” Rey said, lowering her voice a bit. “But I want to believe he can make a new life for himself. I _know_ he can.”

Maz regarded her intently. “Perhaps he could. But neither of you will truly find the belonging you seek. Not if you stay apart.”

Rey hesitated. “But- but I had to come back here. There was the celebration and there are things that need to be done. The resistance needs-“

“The resistance isn’t a resistance anymore: they are victors who are all going about starting new lives, new homes, a better government. You have helped give them those things. They need nothing more from you.”

The reality of those words shook Rey to her core. The idea that her quest was done, she had no further obligation, was one that made her reevaluate everything all over again.

“What you are, you and Ben,” Maz whispered, taking her hand, “You are two pieces of a whole. You will forever feel incomplete, and so will he, if you are without one another. A rare gift from the Force, child. Do not squander it.”

She felt her cheeks heat up, the incompleteness of being without Ben sounding so incredibly intimate and overwhelming. 

“How can either of you expect to find who you are truly meant to be without your other half?” Maz questioned with a little smirk. 

Rey couldn’t possibly come up with a reply to that. Because there was no arguing. She knew it even before Maz finished her little speech and sauntered off again.

Rey was a little distracted after that, turning to walk away and nearly running right into Finn.

“Oh hey, I was just looking for you,” he announced with a friendly hand on her shoulder. “Since the victory party is finally starting to die down, we’re getting everything together and moving most of us to Mygeeto. I was thinking you might want to come along. Maybe not to stay, but at least to help set up. There’s a lot to organize with the new government and I think having a Jedi involved could be helpful. Might be a good change of scenery.”

She swallowed hard, looking into Finn’s eyes and knowing full well what he would see. His shoulders slumped visibly.

“You’re not coming with us,” he stated. “Because you’re going back to Tatooine.”

“I’m not a politician, Finn. They don’t need me. I already did my part. I think you know that.”

Then Rey smiled and jumped at the chance for a subject change. 

“By the way, exactly when were you planning to finally tell me _your_ news?”

Finn crossed his arms. “Ignoring the fact that you’re clearly trying to shift the focus to me instead of your questionable taste in men, I _did_ try to tell you.”

“You didn’t try all that hard,” she countered, her brow lifting in playful argument.

He rolled his eyes. “We were all a little busy.”

“So does this mean you want to start training?” 

“Training for what?” Rose asked, walking up to them unexpectedly. 

Rey glanced back and forth between the two of them.

“Uh…nothing.” Finn hesitated awkwardly. “Just, y’know, more work. There’s gonna be lots of work on Mygeeto.”

Rose looked him up and down suspiciously. “Yeah sure, ok. So are you coming with us, Rey?”

She smiled at Rose, the friend she hoped to have more time with in this newfound time of peace. 

“Not right now. I’ve got somewhere else I need to be.”

Finn huffed and Rose made a face in his direction before looking back at Rey.

“Well don’t run off for too long. I’m not tagging along on any more of Finn’s rescue missions for you. Not that you need it!” 

Rose gave Finn a nudge as she walked away and Rey noted the way it made Finn smile despite the pout he was trying to keep plastered to his face.

“So what happened there?” Rey asked, lowering her voice a bit.

“What?”

“You know what, Finn. After we left Crait and then came here...I could tell something happened between you and Rose. And now you’re what? Keeping secrets from her? Why not tell her about the Force sensitivity?”

Finn started to walk away. “I really don’t think you should be concerned about other people’s relationships.”

“Oh, so you get to comment on my…” She hesitated, not really sure what to call it. “But I can’t comment on yours?”

“There’s nothing to comment on!” 

“And I’ll tell you the same thing you told me.” Rey walked ahead of him then turned to face him. “It’s not nothing.”

Finn stopped, lips twisting in absence of a response.

“Look, someone just gave me a good piece of advice, so I’ll share it with you.” Rey leaned in a little. “Don’t squander something like this. It’s a gift, so treat it like one.”

Finn stared silently back at her for a long moment before finally giving her a little nod. And it was just enough to give her hope.

* * *

“You’re sure about this?” Poe questioned.

“Just as sure as the other ten times you asked,” Rey replied simply, surveying the last of the supplies ready for loading. “As long as you and Chewie take good care of the Falcon!”

“I still think you’re crazy.”

Zorii approached them with a short laugh. “You want me to make him shut up?”

“Oh, you mean you’re finally gonna give me that kiss?” Poe said with a little wink in her direction. 

“How was he any help to the resistance when he wastes this much energy on flirting?” Zorii questioned Rey. “Hey by the way, you need a lift? I’m taking off soon anyway and I can drop you somewhere.”

“I gave her a ship to use. Nobody’s gonna miss the _Aurora_ ,” Poe explained, gesturing to the small courier. “Besides, what do you mean you’re taking off soon? We still need you with us.”

“I already blew stuff up, remember?” She shrugged. “Not sure what else you’d need me for.”

Poe shifted his stance, hands perching on his hips as he visibly searched for the best response.

“Well I’m no politician either,” he countered. “That’s not what I’m heading to Mygeeto for. But we’ll be using it as a base for all sorts of things. There’s still cleanup needed all over the galaxy. We’ve gotta round up any of the remaining First Order, we’ve gotta bring some people back to their homes, set up new homes. I’d really like...I could use a good pilot like you.”

Zorii took slow strides over and then opened her visor to lock eyes with him. “ _You_ could? So is this you asking me to stay?”

He pursed his lips, obviously trying to appear as cool as possible. “Maybe I am.”

She nodded slowly, giving him a hard stare. “Well then...maybe I’ll think about it.”

Rey smiled to herself as she observed from the sidelines, giving Zorii a wave when she finally walked away. 

Chewie walked by unexpectedly and yowled at Poe.

“Hey, I don’t appreciate the sarcasm!” 

“Oh I think Chewie’s right,” Rey laughed. “We never realized how smooth you are till Zorii showed up!”

“Yeah yeah, you two are hilarious,” Poe scoffed. 

After Poe helped her load the last of the supplies and wished her a safe journey, Rey looked over to see D-O scurrying up the ramp of the courier.

“Are you coming with me?” she asked the little droid with a grin.

“Yes please,” came his mechanical reply, wheeling back and forth in what seemed to be excitement.

“Well I’ll be awfully glad to have the company! You make yourself comfortable.”

Rey began her final check before take off. But less than a minute later, as she stood in the cargo hold, she felt everything around her slow...and she turned to see Ben. 

Her eyes lit up at first, excited to announce that she was about to leave for Tatooine. But then she noticed the way he was crouched on the ground, blaster clutched tight in his hands, gazing up at her with a touch of fear in his eyes.

“Ben,” Rey crouched down to his level, speaking softly even though she knew only he could hear her. “What is it?”

“Hiding,” he whispered, so soft that she had to read his lips.

“Who are you hiding from?”

“Tusken Raiders,” Ben explained. “Sun went down before I could get back to the hut.”

Rey sighed in exasperation. “You can’t leave the hut later in the day, I thought I told you that!”

He shot her a look, one brow raised. “And yet, here I am.”

“Ben, listen, I’m on my way.”

“I thought maybe you couldn’t come back. It’s been almost a month, Rey,” he said, looking toward something he must have heard.

“Wait, a _month_? It’s only been-“ She paused, horrified as the wheels turned in her head and it dawned on her that the orbit of Tatooine and Ajan Kloss and their day’s progress was different. Of course she thought it had only been a little more than a week and for him it had been a month.

“I’ll be there soon, ok? I promise. Just get back to the hut.” She leaned in closer, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

But just as she was going to, he suddenly stood, firing the blaster at something in front of him.

“Ben!”

He turned back to her for a split second but then began firing again, and the connection was instantly lost.

Rey stood there staring at the empty space in the ship where he’d been a moment before, unable to move with her heart pounding out of her chest. But in one more breath, her adrenaline kicked into full gear.

She reached up and shoved the lever to shut the door, then immediately rushed to the cockpit. There was no more time to waste. She hadn’t saved Ben Solo from the brink of death just to have him die alone in the desert at the hands of Tusken Raiders. 

Rey began takeoff as quickly as she possibly could, wanting nothing more than to see him in the flesh, right in front of her eyes. 

In fact, she was beginning to think she would never be able to let him out of her sight again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a shocking lack of Ben Solo in this chapter lol. I mean, yes he was there right at the end, but I know it was minimal. Trust me, next chapter fo sho we get plenty of Ben! Also, I hope you liked a touch of a couple other ships mentioned in this chapter. It’s not my main focus of course, but I do really enjoy them as well. :)  
> Thanks again to Lexie for beta reading and I look forward to sharing more soon!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here I am updating this fic again because Reylo won’t leave me alone! XD At least I finished one of my other WIP though, so yay for that. But anyway, here in this fic it’s time for Rey’s long awaited and joyous return to Tatooine...or is it? Let’s find out! ;)

Rey couldn’t land the Aurora fast enough. The journey back to Tatooine felt longer than it really was. The entire way all she could do was imagine every possible scenario that had befallen Ben since their last force connection.

He’d gone to the very brink of death for her and for the cause, and then she’d left him alone on this wasteland of a planet. And for far longer than she intended. Given the circumstances, if one tiny hair on that beautiful man’s head had been harmed, Rey knew she’d never forgive herself.

“May I come?” D-O asked, wheeling along with her as she was finally ready to disembark. 

“No, you stay here,” Rey instructed kindly. “Once I find Ben I’ll be back to get you, I promise. You can power down for a bit if you like.”

“Ok!” 

D-O wheeled happily off to the side and shut down, coaxing a little smile from Rey despite her persistent anxiety.

Once off the Aurora, she quickly paid the docking fair and set out to rent a speeder, an easier option for getting around quickly in the desert. Especially if she might be doing any searching beyond Obi-Wan’s place.

Rey walked briskly through one of the town’s markets, singularly focused. So much so that it truly caught her off guard when she was suddenly yanked into an alley while her hand that went for her lightsaber was instantly restrained.

Ben quickly pulled his hood off, giving her a little smirk. “It’s getting a little easier to find you.”

Rey launched herself at him without hesitation, clamping her arms around his neck and briefly burying her face in his cloak. She felt his arms lift and wrap around her, but a bit more gently than her hold.

“Ben.” His name came out more as a sigh of relief.

She finally pulled back, looking at him again but still gripping the fabric that hung from his shoulders. 

“What are you doing here in town?” Rey questioned, a little concern still lingering.

“I could tell you were back, so I thought I might as well meet you here. Especially since I’ve already got a speeder.”

“Wait, how did you get a speeder?” She started following him the opposite direction down the alley.

“Between my disguise and some...persuasion,” he said with the smallest tug at the corner of his lips as he replaced the hood on his head, “It wasn’t all that difficult.”

“Right,” she rolled her eyes even though she felt a little more at ease with him being out of hiding like this. 

Rey suddenly took note of his quick, steady stride and the effortless tone in his voice. It was a far cry from the last time she’d seen him in person. She could feel his strength.

“You’re so much better,” she commented, aloud though not quite on purpose.

“Yeah I have been for a week or two now,” he explained as they rounded a corner where the speeder was parked out of view. “No more limping.”

Ben climbed on, putting on a pair of protective goggles and then holding out a pair for her which she took.

Rey had to admit that putting on a pair of goggles, climbing onto a speeder behind Ben Solo, and sailing over the desert was just about as strange an experience as she could ever have imagined some months ago. Locking her fingers together a little tighter around his middle, she also admitted that it was as lovely as it was strange. 

The unbelievable reality set in then- they were heading back to Obi-Wan’s hut...together. Ben wasn’t injured anymore, she wasn’t covered in cuts and dirt, and she had nowhere else to be. She was there for really only one purpose, and that was to be with him. There was literally nothing standing in her way.

But as the speeder finally stopped and she began to reluctantly slide her arms away, Ben’s hand gripped her forearm and he glanced over his shoulder at her. The look in his eyes instantly alerted her.

Rey cast her senses out behind her.

“I feel it too,” she whispered, her heart sped up as she met his gaze. 

They very slowly climbed off the speeder, Ben keeping a hand on his blaster as Rey took out her lightsaber. 

They’d barely put both feet on the ground when the first bullet came flying.

Rey lunged in front of Ben, using her lightsaber to deflect as Ben began shooting toward the rocks where someone was clearly hiding. More shots came their way and then they clearly saw not one, not two, but three separate people hiding among the rocks behind Obi-Wan’s home.

Rey continued blocking the shots that came their way- no, _Ben’s_ way. But then she saw one of the three run, hop on a speeder and take off.

“Ben! Don’t let them all get away!”

Ben understood exactly what she meant of course, and as the other two went for speeders, he was able to shoot one while the other one got away. They rushed to where the one had fallen, quickly getting a clearer picture of what they were dealing with as they got nearer.

“Bounty hunter,” Rey murmured breathlessly as she put her lightsaber away.

The man groaned on the ground, looking pretty severely wounded. Ben crouched, grabbing the front of his vest and lifting him a bit.

“Who sent you?!”

The venomous, menacing tone in his voice reminded Rey of a very different time. Not that it bothered her. In this case she too would like to scream at this person for answers.

But the next thing they knew, the helmet clad head fell limply backwards, and there was nothing for Ben to do but let his lifeless body fall to the ground. Instead, he started to search in his pockets. With a fallen expression, he handed Rey what he found.

She turned the Bounty Card over carefully, the name of the target and the face on the tiny screen jumping out instantly.

“Kylo Ren, aliases Ben Solo, Ben Organa...dead or alive,” Rey read softly, the reality of it all crushing the brief moment of bliss she’d experienced only minutes before.

“Let’s go,” Ben said simply, walking back towards the speeder. “The other two will be back, and probably more with them.”

“How did this happen right when I-“ Rey stopped in her tracks, her jaw dropping. “It’s me, they’re here because of me.”

Ben came walking back to where she stood as her slightly panicked words continued.

“If you’re rumored to be alive, what better way to find you than through me? Either because they know I’m helping you, or they’d assume I’m hunting you down as well! They were probably here looking anyway, but once I arrived they knew for sure. Now that I led them to you we’re going to have to find somewhere else for you to-“

“Once we’re safely on the ship, we can exchange plenty of ‘I put you in danger’ stories. For now, let’s just get out of here.”

Rey nodded, knowing it was a pointless thing to spend time dwelling on in the moment, and they both hurried back to the speeder. She could only hope they’d reach the Aurora before anyone else did.

* * *

Rey exhaled slowly once they’d cleared Tatooine’s atmosphere. She heard Ben enter the cockpit and then he dropped something small in her lap.

“Tracker,” he explained. 

Rey turned the crunched up item over in her hand. “I don’t think this is a working tracker.”

“Yeah, not anymore.” He leaned casually against the wall. “I stepped on it.”

She snorted out a laugh, grateful for anything to lighten the mood. Though, it was short lived.

“Ben, I think I know where you need to be.”

“There’s plenty of places in the galaxy that are far enough away, where people don’t care and nobody would think to look.”

She hesitated, anticipating his reaction. “Yeah but...I think I know of one place in particular. I happen to know it’s a really good place to disappear.”

Rey looked up at him and saw the way his gaze hardened and jaw clenched. 

“Like I said, there’s plenty of places.”

“But this one _I know_ ,” Rey insisted. “And the presence of the force is _so strong_ there that we won’t even have to mask our force signatures in case anyone is trying to find you that way.”

Ben crossed his arms over his middle, his mouth twitching in an almost petulant pout. 

“Is it hot and sandy?”

Rey shook her head. “No. It’s a little cool and breezy, and there’s lots of grass.”

There wasn’t ever really anything he could deny her, at this point. She felt that through the connection between them before he gave her a single nod. “Well good, because I’m done with the heat and sand.”

She smiled while adjusting some controls, knowing he was likely far less tolerant to those sort of conditions than she was. Life in space was harsh in very different ways. 

“And how long are you staying?”

That question made her gaze lift to meet his again. She hadn’t said of course, but in her own mind and heart she had already decided the answer to that question before even returning to Tatooine. If it was something he felt, he apparently still chose to hear it from her own lips. 

“As long as you are,” she replied simply. 

Perhaps she’d hidden the intention deeper than she thought. The subtle but noticeable look of pleasant surprise in his eyes warmed her heart. He didn’t even try to argue this time. 

“Y’know, Ahch-To is nice and quiet,” Rey added, even though the decision had already been made. “There’s nobody around except for some gentle creatures and the island’s caretakers.”

“Island.” His expression softened and she could feel him remembering an exchange from what seemed like a lifetime ago. “So we‘ll be alone?”

She blushed, not necessarily meaning to emphasize that particular point, but yes, she supposed that was an especially prominent feature of the island. 

“Just us,” she confirmed softly.

Rey saw the slightest lift in his lips and she set the course for Ahch-To.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m turning this into some sort of tour of different locations lol. But seriously, it makes sense to me that things wouldn’t be all hearts and rainbows right after TROS if Ben had survived. I think someone somewhere would be out to get him, even if it’s not the resistance. So it seemed logical that he wouldn’t necessarily be able to hang out in the same place forever. Besides, who really wants to stay on Tatooine anyway right? I’m with Anakin when it comes to sand. XD  
> So I’m FOR SURE updating my other WIP next before this one, because it’s been waiting too long already. But I hope to get back to this one soon because I do love it so. Hit me up with your thoughts, I’d love to hear from you. :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dances back into Reylo land* Well, for those of you hoping for actual Reylo togetherness and fluff, here is where I begin to satisfy you! We’ve got some fluff, some gratuitous mental images of Ben, and some heavier feels. Read on and I hope you enjoy! :D

“They don’t seem particularly happy to see us,” Ben commented as they exited the ship and saw the small group of caretakers yelling and flailing on the rocks above them.

“It’ll be fine,” Rey replied with a friendly wave to the bunch of them. “They know me.”

As they climbed the grassy hill, D-O following closely behind, Rey glanced back at Ben and smiled to herself at the noticeable serenity on his features as the breeze blew against his face. She knew coming here was the right thing to do.

“Hello!” Rey greeted, then she gestured to both herself and Ben. “We need to stay, please.”

The little creatures huddled a bit and spoke to each other before shuffling off in the direction of the huts.

Rey tugged at Ben’s shirt sleeve, turning his attention from the sea and prompting him to follow the caretakers along with her.

They arrived at one of the huts and stepped inside the small stone enclosure, Rey looking all around her, feeling suddenly caught up in memories so specific to this place.

Ben strolled around taking it all in as well, examining the simple stone design and the ledge built into the wall as a bed. He felt the blanket laid out on the surface and casually took a seat.

That was when unexpected chaos erupted.

The few caretakers who had shown them inside began furiously chattering at him, all surrounding the bed he’d sat on and waving their stubby little arms. Ben’s eyes widened and he stood with hands raised defensively.

“Ok ok! What?” he questioned and desperately looked at Rey. “What did I do?”

She shrugged, trying to keep from laughing because it was an awfully amusing sight- the fear inspiring Supreme Leader surrounded by creatures a fraction of his size who were still managing to intimidate him a bit.

They continued waving at him, slowly ushering him back further and further until he’d been forced to go back out the little doorway the way he’d come in. 

“They don’t like me,” Ben said flatly, stepping away from the hut as Rey stepped outside as well.

She watched with interest as they continued herding him until he was a stone’s throw away at another hut. And when it all became completely clear, she couldn’t hold in her laughter another moment.

“I think you’re not allowed in my hut!” she called over to him. 

His brow lifted. “Should we bother to tell them there’s more than one way I can be in there with you?”

The caretakers yelled at him a few more times and aggressively pointed at his designated hut before finally shuffling off.

“We should get some of the supplies from the ship,” Rey suggested. “I brought you more clothes and personal supplies.”

“Good.” He touched the tunic and cloak he was currently wearing. “I’m pretty sure these have a permanent layer of sand embedded in them.”

Rey and Ben hauled a number of boxes of supplies up the hill and into the caretaker’s village, then arranging them inside their designated huts. It was in their trips up and down the hill that Ben first took note of the porgs who squawked at them from their little nests in the grass or perches on a rock. 

“We should start a fire soon,” Rey commented, glancing at the currently lifeless little fire pit in the center of the room after she brought one of the boxes into his hut. “Oh and if you want a bath or something, the caretakers can help with that.”

“I have a feeling it’ll be cold water for me if it’s up to them,” he said with a withering expression.

“Been a while since we’ve eaten so I can figure out some sort of food if you want to get cleaned up and change,” Rey volunteered...all while thinking about how she hadn’t the faintest idea what to do about that. 

* * *

Ben couldn’t stretch out like he wanted and he certainly couldn’t immerse himself completely, but at least the water in the frustratingly small tub was wonderfully warm and soothing. No doubt because it was Rey who requested they be able to wash.

He lifted water as best he could, splashing it over his face and through his hair before reaching for the bit of soap the caretakers had provided. It was all a far cry from any facilities he was used to on the ships where he’d been living for the past six years of his life. 

Somehow though, he hardly cared. None of these little things mattered much anymore. Not the caretakers who hated him, or the tiny hard bed in the stone hut, or even the tub he had to squeeze into. 

It all faded to nothing in comparison to the fact that  _ she was with him _ .

Washing and running his hands over his torso, his fingers lingered slightly over the faint remainder of his wound. Not just any wound...a mortal wound. 

He couldn’t even bring himself to face all of those recent memories at the moment. It was still so fresh and raw, and he couldn’t quite open himself fully to it yet. 

Ben began rinsing the soap from his body, roughly splashing himself with the water that was quickly losing its desired warmth.

Feeling as clean and refreshed as was possible in the circumstances, he climbed out and encircled his middle with the cloth they’d provided, struggling to make the two ends of the fabric meet at his hip and muttering under his breath.

“Is there anything my size on this island?”

* * *

Rey sat by the fire in her hut, letting her still damp hair benefit from the radiating warmth.

“Rey?”

“Come in.”

But when he pulled the cloth cover aside and stepped through the doorway, Rey realized she wasn’t prepared.

It took her breath away, seeing him like this. Almost more so than the moment she’d seen him literally naked from the waist up. This was a different kind of exposure. He looked so...innocent. 

He wore some of the fresh clothes she’d brought for him, just some simple pants and tunic, his hair damp just like hers, and his feet bare. Everything about him, perhaps aside from his impressive height, was simple and unassuming. It was all a very far cry from the man who was once a terrifying creature in a mask.

“Here,” Rey offered, holding out a wooden bowl with a watery concoction in it. It was an easy enough way to break the sudden tension in the room.

She could sense a fair amount of hesitance as he took the bowl and examined it.

“I found some root vegetables. The island is rocky so I think those things grow well here,” she explained before taking a bite of her own soup.

If she weren’t so embarrassed, she might have laughed aloud at the way she and Ben and grimaced in time with each other as the spoonful hit their taste buds. 

“I don’t usually...I mean, back on Jakku I used to just eat rehydrated-”

“I could give it a try tomorrow.”

“Give what a try?”

Ben shrugged, still doing his best to chew and swallow. “Cooking.”

She nodded slowly, a memory coming to mind, though it wasn’t her own. She saw seemingly endless lists of vegetation species, various notations of cooking methods and tools, even distilling instruction…

“It was a long time ago,” he said, a notable softness in his voice as little details from his past were seen through someone else’s eyes.

“Pretty convincing though. You’re definitely welcome to have a go tomorrow,” Rey agreed, setting her bowl aside. 

“Do they have any tools for fish-“

“Shh!”

Rey thrust her hand out towards him, hushing him as she heard voices of some of the caretakers passing by. The last thing she wanted was for Ben to get another verbal lashing and be sent back to his hut.

Her heart nearly stopped though, when she felt him gently take hold of the hand she’d silenced him with.

“It’s ok,” he whispered eyes locked onto hers. “I should probably just leave before they come back. You can get some sleep.”

_ No I can’t _ , she wanted to scream. _ I just want to be with you _ .

But Rey forced herself to smile, even while her fingers gripped his hand a little tighter.

“Ok. You’re probably tired too.”

She sensed something he wasn’t saying as well in that moment...but he still stood, allowing their hands to separate.

“I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Sure,” she managed to agree. “In the morning.”

One more moment of hesitation, and then he swept through the cloth door cover and back to his own hut. 

* * *

Ben peered out the window for the tenth time. At least three hours had passed, based on where the moon sat in the sky. He paced a bit before laying back on the floor of the stone hut where he’d arranged some blankets. There was no possible way he could fit on that glorified bench of a bed against the wall. His entire lower legs would be hanging off uncomfortably.

Not that he could sleep much anyway. He hadn’t been able to sleep well for years. He knew he should try though, or at least close his eyes and attempt some relaxation.

Ben shut his eyes, beginning a deep relaxation technique his uncle had taught him which he hadn’t attempted for a very long time. But the moment he entered some form of calm, the scene hit his brain...

_ Exegol, just as it was when he and Rey had been there, and Palpatine exactly as he’d been. Ben stood behind Rey watching as she raised her arm, lifting the lightsaber high above her head. Ben heard himself yelling, begging her to stop. But she brought the lightsaber down, delivering Palpatine’s death blow. There was a flash of blinding red light as power passed from the Emperor to his granddaughter, and then all went still. _

_ Rey turned, a calm on her features as she closed the distance between them. Ben looked into her eyes and heard himself saying her name over and over again, but she seemed not to hear him. The next flash of light he saw was from the beam of a lightsaber as it passed through his chest. _

_ Ben felt as though the wind was knocked out of him as he fell backwards onto the ground. The moment he did, it was as if Rey became herself again. She knelt in front of him, grasping his face and weeping as she said his name and begged him to stay with her. _

Ben’s eyes opened with a jolt. It was all just a dream of course...but not his.

He instantly threw his blankets off and got up, rushing out of his hut and into Rey’s. As he suspected, he found her curled up on the bench, shifting restlessly, the moonlight illuminating a bit of perspiration on her brow.

Ben knelt beside the bed, gently placing one hand against her cheek and another on her shoulder.

“Rey,” he whispered. “Rey, wake up.”

He felt her whole body jolt and she let out a little gasp as her eyes finally opened and met his. It took her a moment; a moment of staring back at him before she exhaled in relief to be back in reality and out of such a nightmare. 

“I saw it too,” Ben added, his thumb moving just a little against her cheek. 

That simple statement coaxed a few fresh tears from her eyes...and then she leaned over, wrapping her arms tight around him and pressing her face into the crook of his neck.

Ben didn’t hesitate, quickly pulling her to him and gathering her into his arms. He grabbed her blankets and pillow and laid them on the floor as best he could with one hand before easing them both onto the makeshift bed.

Rey’s arm slid around his chest, anchoring herself as he did his best to tug one of the blankets up and over her. Ben felt her sigh against him and her whole body relax peacefully. He was doing this for her of course, to comfort her and help her sleep. But it very quickly dawned on him that  _ he _ hadn’t felt this level of calm in longer than he could remember. Had he ever felt it?

_ Two that are one _ .

Yes, he’d been the one to utter those words, but there were clearly aspects of this bond that he’d never even considered till now. The possibilities and unknowns both frightened and thrilled him.

“Ben,” Rey whispered. “Don’t leave.”

His answer was murmured into her hair as he chose to leave all his questions for morning and let his eyes shut peacefully. 

“Never.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Lexie, because she and I are having Way Too Much Fun planning all things Reylo at the moment lol. Always the helpful and influential beta reader! No doubt I’ll be sharing more of this soon, because these two continue to invade my brain. I’d love to hear your thoughts, so do please hit me up if you enjoyed the update. Thanks again! ;)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp...here I am again lol. There’s a touch of reality and feels in this one, but I think at least some of you will be glad to hear there’s also a good bit more fluff. Happy Friday, and hope you enjoy! ;)

Rey finished the last bite of breakfast, glad that she got through it with only one embarrassing groan of enjoyment. Maybe two.

“I still don’t understand how you managed to get porg eggs,” she commented. 

Ben smiled proudly. “I’m allowed to have at least one creature on this island that doesn’t hate me.”

She ran a hand through her still undone hair, looking out at the ocean from where they sat on the rocks. It was probably time to stop avoiding the inevitable conversation. 

“My dream woke you last night?”

His eyes darted to hers as he set his plate down.

“Not exactly. I wasn’t really sleeping. I don’t usually sleep well.”

“Me neither,” Rey replied softly. “But you know that.”

“I don’t usually,” he added. “But last night- with you- that was the first time I’ve slept that long and that soundly, maybe in years.”

“Me too.”

Rey thought about how they’d awoken, their arms still holding each other tight and her cheek pressed against his chest. It was a level of comfort and security that she hardly knew existed. And even if it did, she never would have thought it was within her grasp.

Ben paused, brushing his hands off and looking down for a moment, then out to the ocean, and finally back at her.

“Rey, I don’t know why we are...what we are. I don’t know exactly when it started or how. But I think we need to figure out what to do with all of it. This seems like the right time and place to do that.”

“Right.” Rey nodded, recalling Maz’s words. “Now that we’re together.”

Ben hesitated visibly before speaking again.

“So then...sleeping might be one thing to figure out.”

Rey’s couldn’t resist teasing a bit. “Well first of all, you don’t fit on any bed here. I think we need something better than a blanket on a stone floor.”

His eyes brightened just a touch. “We?”

She chewed her lip to keep from grinning to broadly.

“I was thinking maybe we could set something up outside. This time of year is still pretty warm, so maybe on the grass between our two huts. The caretakers can’t possibly punish us if we’re not hiding inside together. There might be a sleeping mat or two on the Aurora.”

“That’s what you want?”

That simple question touched her and she had to swallow thickly before responding. He had to be able to feel it. She certainly wasn’t trying to hide it.

“I just- I don’t want to sleep alone,” Rey finally whispered. “Not anymore.”

Ben sucked in a breath, his eyes roving over her face and coming to rest on her lips for long enough that she thought she might burst into flames.

“Me neither,” he said, a more playful tone returning to his voice as he smiled. “This is new, you and I agreeing on a few things.”

Rey chuckled as they both stood from their little spot on the rock. “We’re not gonna keep agreeing on everything y’know.”

“Good. I might miss arguing.” Ben smirked. “Is there anywhere to spar on this rock?”

“Absolutely.”

Well, one more agreement wouldn’t hurt, she mused while following him.

* * *

The crack of their wooden staffs colliding echoed through the rocks as they stepped back and forth, one way and the other. 

Rey couldn’t help thinking about how this kind of battle between herself and Ben felt so different from ones in the past. Of course there was still the adrenaline, and her heart was pounding and lungs working overtime to distribute oxygen. But it was the emotion that was so different. There was no more rage, no drive to see him fall and stand over him as he did. The only drive was to be better, and to see him be better right along with her.

It felt more like a dance than anything else. 

“You’re distracted,” Ben panted, stepping back for a moment and lifting the bottom of his shirt to wipe his brow.

“Even if I am, I’m still winning,” Rey countered with a laugh. 

“We’re keeping score now?”

“I know I am,” she stated confidently, while at the same time admitting to herself that she was indeed distracted.

She might be a little bit less so once Ben put his shirt all the way back down.

At the mention of some friendly competition, Rey could see the new determination in his eyes as stepped toward her, giving his staff a little spin in his palm before swinging it at her again. She blocked the move and their little dance continued as before.

“I hope you know I could do this all day,” Rey grunted ten grueling minutes later, shoving her staff back against his, their noses inches apart.

He grinned. “You sure? I feel like you could use some relaxing meditation or something.”

Rey shoved him back with a growl. But as she stepped forward to swing again, her feet hit a wet patch of rock and went right out from under her.

She felt her body slam to a halt before hitting the rock, her shoulder and hip hovering only an inch or less above the ground. Ben stood over her, hand stretched out to hold her up with the force. 

Rey exhaled heavily as he set her down the rest of the way and then reached a hand out to help her up again. She stood, toe to toe with him, still gripping his hand tight.

“Fine,” she admitted breathlessly. “Maybe time for some meditation.”

* * *

Rey rummaged around on the Aurora, opening cupboards in search of something helpful. She found a couple of extra blankets and pillows and set those aside while continuing on her search for something more suitable to lay on.

Moving to the other side of the ship to check a storage bench, she happened to glance out a small window. Ben caught her eye a little ways off, standing by the water with a fishing spear the caretakers had begrudgingly provided him with. A couple of porgs waddled around where he stood and then one of them flew up to perch on top of the spear. Ben tried to gently shoo the creature and when that didn’t work, he had to go to the trouble of lowering the spear and actually nudging the porg off with his hand and onto the grass. Rey burst out laughing when the same porg happily flew right back up to instead perch on Ben’s shoulder. 

She finally located the cushioned mats she had hoped to find, then made her way to the ships com system. Rey didn’t want anyone to worry about her, and she knew staying in touch was the best way to prevent that from happening.

“Rey?”

“Hi, Finn! How’s everyone?”

“We’re busy here actually.” She could believe it, there sounded like a lot of people in the background. “There’s a lot of work setting up the government here on Mygeeto. What about you?”

“We’re good. Ben and I, we’re somewhere else now. Not on Tatooine. There was a little bit of trouble and it was better for him to leave.”

“Ok. Well...I hope it’s pretty hidden.”

Rey frowned. “Why do you say that?”

Finn paused and she heard him let out a little sigh.

“Look, one of the things the government is organizing is some  _ cleanup _ after the battle at Exegol.”

“What sort of cleanup?”

“The reality is that the First Order is still out there. Yeah, Palpatine is gone and the Sith are gone. But the First Order is kind of something else. It’s a government, and the feeling is that they’re going to start getting themselves organized...and probably make a final stand.”

Rey’s shoulders slumped, sitting down in the cockpit at those words. It was the last thing she wanted to hear: more war to be fought.

“Rey?”

“Yeah, I’m here,” she replied, elevating her tone higher than her mood.

“I hate to share news like that, but I just feel like you should know...you and Ben.”

Rey smiled. She knew how Finn felt and what his concerns were, but clearly he was trying to be supportive.

“Wherever you are, if it’s secluded and you can’t be found, he needs to stay there, ok? At least for now. And don’t worry, as far as your friends who know the truth are concerned, Kylo Ren died on Exegol. We can do our best to dispel any rumors we hear to the contrary.”

“Finn…” She could hardly find the right words of gratitude. “That means everything, thank you.”

“You’ve done enough. I’d say you deserve time to yourself. Get in touch again soon though, ok?”

“I will, I promise. Tell everyone else to take care.”

Rey ended the communication, shutting everything down on the ship again to save on remaining power before exiting again. If her mood had been brought down a bit by that conversation, the sight that greeted her when she walked over to Ben was enough to lift it.

“I caught one tiny fish that’s probably mostly bone,” he reported flatly, holding up his spoils, then pointed to the two porgs on one shoulder and one on the other. “And I’m pretty sure these three porgs think they’ve caught me.”

* * *

The caretakers seemed to take note of what Rey was setting up on the grass, looking over and chattering to each other a bit, but they didn’t cause any trouble about it. Rey laid out the two mats she’d found, covering them with blankets and then adding more blankets to go over the two of them. 

As she stood there, surveying the little bed she’d created, the moment became suddenly poignant. Never before in her life had she arranged a bed to share with someone else. Wherever she lay down her head, it had always been for her alone.

But she wasn’t alone anymore.

“Looks good,” Ben commented, shaking her from her thoughts as he approached.

Rey smiled. “Yeah, not bad.”

They stood there, both staring down at the cozy setup, neither really making a move to get in. It all seemed so incredibly right and natural until that very moment. This was different from the night before. There was no heightened emotion, no panic from an unsettling dream, no desperate need for comfort. This was just two people choosing to climb into bed together. Because they wanted to.

Ben’s voice managed to break the tension a little.

“I have this feeling that if we don’t get in, the porgs will find this pretty quickly and decide it’s a perfect nest.”

He made a little ‘after you’ gesture and nod toward the bed.

It took a minute or two for them both to settle in, get comfortable, and become still. 

Rey stared up at the blackness of the night sky and the shimmering stars that adorned it, but she couldn’t truly focus on much else besides the live energy that filled the space between herself and Ben. The question that eventually left her lips wasn’t one she planned, but it just came out.

“What did you mean?” Rey asked very quietly. “The times you asked me to join you and offered me your hand.”

In her peripheral she saw Ben’s head turn and his eyes lock onto her, so she turned as well.

“I’ve asked myself hundreds of times,” she added. “I pretended I didn’t care, but deep down I wanted to know.  _ So badly _ .”

“Rey.” His voice broke ever so slightly and it nearly made her heart burst. “You already know what I meant.”

His hand found hers between their bodies under the blankets and their fingers intertwined, like magnets clicking together.

She drew a shaky breath, not from fear or anger, or sadness anymore, but from the love that filled her chest to the point of crowding out the expansion of her lungs.

_ Love _ .

Had she ever really thought of it like that till now? Maybe a part of her had always known. That that’s where they were headed, what their destiny was, and how they were connected. It was a connection in some ways simpler and in some ways far more complex than their bond through the force. And perhaps ultimately, both connections were one in the same.

In that moment at least, that sort of detail didn’t mattered.

Rey had never been more fully convinced of what this was. Not just in herself, but she could feel it in him now, stronger than ever. She saw it shining back at her through his eyes.

Those eyes that drifted down to her lips, just like they had that morning.

She thought about leaning over, kissing him just like she had on Exegol, which seemed like a lifetime ago now. And she was sure he’d happily kiss her back if she did. But that wasn‘t how she wanted it to go this time.

She also understood that this was a newly reborn Ben Solo, trying every day to let go of the mask he’d worn for years, symbolically, even if not always physically. He didn’t want to take what wasn’t his anymore. So perhaps she’d simply need to give him permission.

Rey lifted her other hand, bringing it up to gently touch his face while keeping her eyes fixed on his. And then she told him, loud as she possibly could without actually saying the words. 

He heard her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I GOTTA get back to another WIP next, but I will likely be wrapping this one up in another couple chapters. I’d love to hear your thoughts on this one though, and thanks again for the kudos and comments!  
> And thank you to Lexie, as always, the beta reader extraordinaire! ;)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get real for Rey and Ben in this chapter, guys. Can’t just be stuffed full of fluffy porg feathers forever lol! I’ll say no more and see you at the bottom note... ;)

**Two Weeks Later**

Ben woke, turning his head toward the slight weight against him. He blinked, bringing his vision into focus and seeing Rey’s head snuggled against his chest and her arm draped over his body. She was still completely out, snoring very lightly, and he decided he didn’t want to wake her, especially with how late they’d finally gone to sleep the night before. 

He very cautiously slid himself out from under her arm and placed her head gently on the pillow in place of where he’d been, pulling the blanket over her as he got up to put his tunic over his undershirt and creep away. 

D-O wheeled over, starting to follow Ben up the hill as he went in his search for some porg eggs.

“Can you carry things?” Ben asked, glancing down at the droid as he walked.

“Yes, sir,” D-O replied politely, a little cubby opening up on his side.

Ben smiled. “Ok, then I guess you can come along.”

A few minutes later, after Ben had gently wrangled the porgs to give up some of their eggs, he strolled along one of the hills in search of a particular variety of herb he’d noticed the other day. As he did, the Aurora caught his eye down below on the rocks.

Ben paused, crouching on the ground as he stared down at the ship...and thinking about the events of the previous day.

The morning before, the Visitors had made their monthly return from sea, which signaled the start of a celebration that would last for the entire three days they were back until their departure once again. Ahch-To had quickly erupted into happy chaos. Given the occasion and the creatures’ elevated mood, the Caretakers even urged Ben and Rey to join in the food, music, and dancing.

They’d been caught up in the Lanai’s celebration. They ate the food, drank the wine, which was surprisingly strong for creatures of that size, and even danced a little when they played some of their traditional songs. As things were slowing down, they both agreed the air seemed a bit chillier than normal that night, and then Rey suggested checking the Aurora for an additional blanket.

They’d gone onto the ship and Ben opened one of the storage lockers, pretty quickly finding a blanket tucked inside. But when he’d turned around to face Rey and hand it over, something very quickly shifted.

Looking back, he wasn’t completely sure who’d moved first, not that it really mattered. The point was that before he knew it, they’d practically crashed into each other, sharing kisses that could only be described as desperate and hungry. He’d lifted her off the ground and felt her legs wrap instantly around him, making it all too easy to turn and press her back against the storage lockers. 

The kisses they’d shared over the previous couple of weeks had been different...tamer. Stirring to some degree, yes. But they’d all been in the open and not far from the prying eyes of the Caretakers. Being as secluded and private as they were in the ship had conjured a very different feeling. 

Ben let out a heavy breath, thinking back on the kissing and touching that had been rapidly gaining momentum. At least, before his awkward exit. 

He cringed at the memory now. Not because he regretted the decision, but because he hadn’t been in the right mindset to even explain himself properly. Fears and doubts suddenly pushed into his mind and he’d simply set her down, cradled her face while kissing her on the forehead, and stepped back. 

They’d stared at each other for a moment, both catching their breath as Ben noted the understandable question in Rey’s eyes. And then he’d leaned down to retrieve the discarded blanket.

“I should go...put this on the bed,” he’d told her, and exited the ship.

He’d settled into their bed, laying there in anticipation of her following him and wondering if he would have to explain himself there and then. But as he finally heard her footsteps approaching, they went right past where he lay and she disappeared into her hut. He couldn't blame her, feeling her confusion and embarrassment sizzling through their bond.

Ben had spent the next couple of hours tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable, unable to fall asleep. And somewhere in the very early hours of the morning, Rey must have reached the same pinnacle of frustration because he heard her exit the hut and silently climb into the bed with him. If the adjustments of the blankets told him anything though, her decision had been made begrudgingly. And the closeness he’d awoken to clearly happened in her sleep, because while they were both still awake, she’d been simply laying at his side.

Ben stood, placing the herbs in D-O’s little cubby along with the few small eggs, thinking about how suddenly desperate he was to explain things to Rey, that he didn’t want her to think that he was somehow pulling away from something that he had really wanted from the very beginning with her. It was difficult to know where to begin, to find the words that wouldn’t blow up in his face.

“Trying to be more responsible than your old man, eh kid?”

Ben whirled, seeing the face he knew he’d see. “Dad.”

Han Solo strolled lazily by him, taking a seat on a nearby rock. 

“Now, don’t get me wrong,” Han went on, “Celebrating after the end of a war is a lot of fun. Your mother and I wanted you as soon as we knew you were coming. We just didn’t expect you to come along exactly when you did.” He let out a short chuckle.

“Yeah, I know,” Ben replied softly.

“Well of course you know. After all, I’m just your projection.” Han gave him a little smile while tapping a finger to his temple. “I mean, I know I’m no force ghost, but it beats talking to yourself.”

Ben had to admit that was true, which was likely why he kept conjuring these talks with his father. Talking to himself hadn’t often led him down the right path.

“You know it’s not the right time yet, don’t you?” Han asked.

Ben nodded. “I keep being afraid...of what could happen.”

“A child scares you.”

He felt like the wind was knocked out of him at the actual word _child_. So he was especially surprised by his own answer.

“No, it doesn’t. Not if it’s with Rey. But just...not now.”

Han nodded thoughtfully. “When?”

Ben glanced around him at the island he’d genuinely come to appreciate and enjoy living on. But that didn’t change his definitive answer to the question.

“When we have a real life together, somewhere different, not so isolated. When I don’t have to watch my back with every move I make. We can’t go on like this.”

Han smirked. “Smart kid. Pretty sure you get that from your mother.”

Ben looked down for a moment, a little afraid to admit the next part aloud.

“There’s something else too. Rey is...I think she’s keeping something from me. There’s something worrying her almost all the time, and she’s trying to hide it away. I can feel it.”

Han stood and approached Ben, clapping him on the shoulder in a move that Ben could almost believe he really felt.

“Talk to her. About all of it,” Han instructed. “Your mother and I didn’t do nearly enough of that, and it ruined us. What you have is precious, so be smarter with it than I was.”

Ben swallowed hard, a lump forming rapidly. “I wish...Dad, I wish-“

“I know you do, kid.” He smiled softly. “So do I.”

And then he was gone, leaving Ben alone again, the wind coming off the ocean and whipping against his back. He suddenly took note of the fact that D-O was scooting around in circles nearby, apparently unsure what to do while waiting for him.

“Ok come on,” Ben prompted, walking back toward the Caretaker’s village again. “And you be gentle with breakfast.”

* * *

Rey was not happy. No, more than that, she admitted. She was bordering on genuinely angry. 

She thought back to the first kiss they’d shared a couple of weeks before when she’d needed to make it a point to very clearly give Ben the go ahead. So logically, that could not have been the issue when they were on the Aurora the previous night. There was no lack of willing particulation being conveyed on her part. And though she was by no means experienced, she felt thoroughly convinced that his level of desire matched hers. 

Rey knew without a doubt that he wanted much more than the sweet kisses and cuddles they’d been sharing up to then, and she certainly did as well. In a way, it felt like the electricity they’d always shared was leading up to this inevitability. So where was this sudden hesitance coming from? 

She adjusted the blanket around her shoulders, glancing over to where he was quietly making some breakfast. They’d have to address this, and soon. The more time they spent together it was becoming all the more clear that Maz had been right: _together_ was how they both did best. It made lengthy fights and silent treatments an even worse option than they already were.

“Here you go.”

Rey glanced up, not having seen Ben approach till he was there holding out a plate. 

“Thanks,” she replied softly.

She took some bites of the, as usual, inventively flavorful eggs first. Best to get something in her stomach before jumping into some sort of a deep discussion. 

“I’m sorry about last night.”

Rey looked up, Ben staring at her from where he sat. He’d beaten her to it.

She nodded, finishing chewing first.

“I was so confused. It’s probably the most confused I’ve been since we got here. I thought we were...on the same page.” She paused. “And I was hurt too.”

The look in Ben’s eyes at those words nearly broke her heart.

Rey shook her head in frustration. “I thought I was being more than clear. And I thought you wanted exactly the same thing that I-”

“I _did_ want what you wanted,” Ben instantly cut in. “And trust me, I knew exactly what you wanted. I could feel it.”

Rey’s mouth felt suddenly parched, making it a struggle to even swallow.

“But what we both wanted...that can’t happen,” he added. “Not here.”

She frowned. “Why?”

He chuckled lightly, running a hand through his hair. “Growing up among who knows what on Jakku must have exposed you to the realities of life pretty quickly, so I imagine you can think of a reason why getting _that much closer_ might complicate things for us.”

 _Oh_. The realization hit her very quickly of course, which was something she simply hadn’t considered till that moment. Nothing had mattered to her except saving Ben, keeping him safe, deciding that they were together, and then moving forward. Somehow, a simple little thing like that- which was anything but simple- hadn’t really been on her mind.

Ben got up from where he sat, moving next to her instead.

“I know I should have explained last night,” he said softly. “But I couldn’t think straight enough to do anything except walk away. If I stayed near you or even just kept looking at you…”

Rey nodded, needing no further explanation. She knew because she’d felt the same way he had. She’d been under the very same spell in that moment, and it was definitely the kind that couldn’t be broken without a bit of physical separation. 

She reached over, threading their fingers together and feeling relief at the tension between them dissipating. 

“Ok, so I guess we can’t…” She raised her brows at him and he smirked. “What would you suggest then?”

Ben’s gaze shifted a bit, and it was enough to tell her that maybe she wasn’t going to like what came next.

“I have been thinking about that, but first there’s something else we need to talk about.” He locked eyes with her intensely. “I think we need to talk about what you’re so worried about all the time.”

Rey instinctively gripped his hand tighter, holding on for stability as a wave of fear washed over her.

“I think you should finally tell me whatever it is you’ve been keeping from me for the past two weeks. I can feel it there, but you’ve hidden it from me. So I’m asking you, please, just tell me.”

She exhaled slowly, knowing he was right. Of course she needed to tell him, be open and honest, just as he had been with her. But there was a part of her that also knew this could change things. Which is likely why she’d been keeping it to herself in the first place.

Rey had been so happy here, just her and Ben. Things seemed so simple. But sitting here, their breakfast half eaten and fingers intertwined, she realized that she had wanted to continue to live what was ultimately a lie, much as she’d done her whole life. It was the thought of the girl in the desert with marks on the wall and gaze always at the sky that made her realize that as much as she wanted to hang to what they had here, neither of them really could.

“Ok,” she whispered. “I’ll tell you…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This just in...there’s a shocking lack of birth control on Ahch-To. XD But seriously, it did seem logical that this would be a legit concern and have to be addressed. I know I know, kills the mood. But hey, pretty steamy make-out session on the ship amiright? ;) And as you can see, there’s a little more conflict to be dealt with. If I can update my other WIP soon, hopefully I’ll have ch 9 of this fic out very soon after.  
> Thanks, as always, to Lexie who is continually helping edit and plot like a champ! :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From a couple of the few comments I got on ch 8, it seems I gave the impression that Rey is about to reveal something new and groundbreaking that you guys don’t already know. Heads up, that might not be the case so don’t be too disappointed. You’ll see what I mean lol! Anyway, I just really enjoyed writing this chapter. :)

“And you didn’t think that was something I’d need to know?!” Ben yelled, standing now and stalking back and forth.

“Obviously I would have told you eventually.”

Rey knew she didn’t have a leg to stand on even before he came right back with a reply.

“Eventually?” He huffed. “When? You mean like if a strange ship lands on Ahch-To and you realize it’s time to make a quick getaway because I’m about to be taken into custody?”

“You’re safe here, I’m not worried about that!”

“So it’s impossible for anyone to find this island?” He stared her down. “Says the woman  _ who found this island _ !”

“But it’s unlikely anyone will! I had a map, remember?” she yelled back, her own temper starting to flare. “And besides, they’re not actively looking for you, because most everyone thinks you’re dead. And if you stay put it’s unlikely anyone will doubt that you died on Exegol.”

Ben turned for a moment, setting his hands on his hips and muttering something she didn’t quite hear before turning to look at her again.

“So that’s what you think the answer is? I just have to…” He lifted his hands glancing around. “Stay here and hide, what? Forever? How is that going to work, Rey?”

Rey set her mouth in a tight line, angry at him, angry at herself, angry at the whole situation. 

“How is anything else going to work? You  _ have _ to keep hidden! I don’t know for how long, but I’d say for a very long time. It’s the only way to keep you safe!”

Ben’s brow shot up. “Keep me safe? Rey...I’m not the unconscious man you had to literally carry off Exegol, and I haven’t been for weeks. It’s not your job to keep me safe.” He shook his head. “So I disagree, this is not the only way.”

Rey shot up from where she sat now as well, adrenaline flowing too freely to sit still. 

“What? You think somewhere else is better?”

“No,” he said simply, staring out at the water for a moment. “I can try to make things right by helping the Resistance…first by turning myself in.”

Rey’s jaw dropped, multiple words and phrases rolling around on her tongue before she was able to sift through them all and speak coherently.

“What?!” She circled around him, unsatisfied yelling at his back. “That is not an option!”

“But hiding forever is?” Ben challenged. 

Rey’s gaze hardened a touch, a bit of hurt creeping in.

“I never said you’d be hiding alone. Ben, I’m not leaving you again. If you stay here on Ahch-To, that’s where I’ll be. And if you have to leave and find somewhere else, then I’ll be there too! All I want is for you to be safe and for us to be together.” She crossed her arms. “Is that not enough?”

His eyes shot to hers, stepping over instantly to cradle her face and speak more softly.

“ _ You _ are enough. But this kind of life for us...it’s not. I think deep down you know that.”

Rey shook her head and he released his grasp. “But it’s not worth the risk.”

“Of course it is.”

“It’s not!” she practically screamed, her voice climbed again. She was vaguely aware of some interested chatter from the Caretakers nearby. “Ben, what if they kill you?!”

“What if they don’t?! It  _ is _ worth the risk!” He countered just as loudly. “It’s worth the risk for us! For you! I didn’t trade my life for yours on Exegol for you to have to-“

Ben suddenly bit back the words he was spewing and pressed his lips together, turning away again as Rey’s eyes widened.

She stood there in shock for a moment, trying to reconcile what he’d just said with what she already knew.

“Ben,” she finally whispered. “What do you mean by-“

“Rey, don’t.”

But it was a little too late for hiding away secrets. With the mention of the event, Ben’s memories of Exegol must have come flooding to the surface...because suddenly Rey felt the truth of their mutual escape as clearly as she felt the ocean breeze on her face.

The full weight of it hit her harder than she was prepared for, filling her eyes and stealing the air from her lungs. She stepped aside, blindly feeling for a nearby rock to lower herself onto. As she did, Ben joined her, exhaling heavily as he did.

“I cared about two things when I got to Exegol. I knew Palpatine had to die, and I knew you had to leave that planet alive,” he explained softly, meeting her watery gaze. “I gave you  _ everything I had left _ to make sure that’s exactly how things went. Nothing was more important to me than that. Besides, what sort of life would I have had if you died and I lived?”

Rey sucked in a shaky breath. “And what about me?” she asked with a sniff. “You think I’d have been just fine? Losing you after all we’d been through?”

She watched his jaw clench as he looked away, because he knew the answer to that question. 

“Ben, we’re... _ connected _ . I can’t bear the thought of losing you any more than you can with me. So can’t you understand?  _ That’s _ why I don’t want you to turn yourself in.”

He reached over, silently swiping the tears from her cheeks before encircling her body with his arm and pulling her close against him. She felt him turn his head, resting his lips against her hair, just breathing like that for a few moments.

“We’ll talk about it later,” Ben finally whispered, punctuating the statement with a kiss on her forehead before he got up and walked away.

Rey watched him go, walking up the hill as if he had somewhere to go and something to do. But that was not the case of course. He was just as overwhelmed as she was, and he simply needed a moment. She could give him that.

But she couldn’t help thinking about the previous night, how she couldn’t get comfortable enough to sleep without the weight of his arm around her and the length of his body against hers, even being as frustrated with him as she was. She also let her mind drift back to their intimate moment on the Aurora and smiled to herself, thinking there was something truly miraculous about the contrast. Amazing how the touch of his body and hands had the power to lull her into the most restful of slumbers, while also being able to awaken her in ways she’d never experienced before.

Ben Solo was more a part of her now than he ever had been, and their connection was only growing by the day. Even the thought of losing him recalled a feeling of emptiness that was all too familiar to her. One she never wanted to feel again.

* * *

Ben slipped a clean shirt over his head, feeling refreshed after washing up. He’d spent a long while meditating, had a particularly lively but quiet sparring match with Rey, perhaps indicative of their mutual feelings of frustration, and then spent time searching the ship’s database for any information on existing laws he could find.

What he found wasn’t wildly hopeful, but it was something. And at the very least, he felt pretty confident a death sentence wouldn’t be signed the moment he showed his face, considering that, Jedi or not, he was the only other trained Force user in the known galaxy. It was all a process, which meant time. Time was what he needed, to prove who he was and that he could finally be useful to the people who he’d too often tormented. 

Stepping out of his hut, he saw Rey over the nearby hill, working with some of the Caretakers to get the fires going as the night’s party began. Her face and eyes were glowing as the tiny blaze got started, and for a moment he couldn’t move, completely transfixed by the sight. It certainly wasn’t the first time, but so often in the past he’d felt conflicted. That wasn’t the case anymore. Now he could march right over to her, take her hand, wrap her in his arms, kiss her, and tell her in no uncertain terms just how he felt. No need anymore to express his affection in thinly veiled political proposals.

Of course he didn’t want to lose what they now had, just as much as she didn’t. It was just a matter of convincing her of the best way to do that in the long run. So that he’d truly never have to let her go.

Ben strolled over to her, pleased at the way her eyes brightened at his approach. Perhaps she wasn’t still so very angry.

Rey slipped an arm around his waist, glancing up and smiling softly. “They’re making some food for tonight. It’ll be ready soon.”

“Good. Want to take a walk?”

She nodded and he led her out onto the top of one of the island’s grassy hills. 

When they got there, Ben looked over at Rey, the way she stared up into the night sky at all the glittering stars, planets, and moons above their heads. He smiled to himself at the wonder reflected in her eyes before stepping behind her and lifting his arm to point out one particular spot in her line of vision.

“See that one there?”

“Mmhm.”

“I know that planet,” he said softly. “I’ve been there. I used to go with my dad on smuggling jobs sometimes, and I saw all sorts of places.”

Rey glanced back, smiling warmly. “Yeah?”

“Oh yeah. And that planet there, it was amazing. There was a species of wildflower that covered so many of their fields, but it was so unusual. All the flowers looked different, but they really were all the same flower.”

Ben lifted his arm again, shifting over to another spot. 

“Over there on that planet they have a kind of bird with these long legs, and the babies like to get around by hanging onto their mother’s legs with their feet. So you’d have this bird flying by sometimes with as many as three or four babies hanging off each of their legs.”

Rey laughed along with him at the mental image.

She leaned back against his chest and he felt her let out a little sigh.

“The galaxy is such a big and beautiful place. Someday I’d like to see more of it.”

He slid his arms around her waist, holding her and resting his cheek against her the side of her head. 

“I want you to see it,” he whispered. “In fact, I want to show it to you. All of it.”

Ben paused, feeling her arms come to rest over his.

“But I can’t,” he added.

Rey turned in his arms then, looking up at him as she saw and no doubt felt the sadness in his words.

“That’s what I want for us, Rey. It’s what I‘ve always wanted, even before I turned away from the dark side. If you think all I envisioned was us sitting on a cold, dark throne somewhere and ordering people around, you’d be wrong. I’ve always seen us going places and experiencing things together. My vision for power changed, but my vision with you- for us- never has since the first moment it started to grow.”

He saw her swallow, reaching up to touch his face as she listened solemnly.

“I let that go the moment I transferred my life force to you, because I thought I had to. But somehow, by some miracle, I was given another chance to have all of that with you,” he said. “I cannot waste that chance by hiding for the rest of our lives. The fact that the Resistance is fighting this new battle right now means that I could prove my loyalty if they let me. This is an opportunity I have to take.”

Rey sniffed away some tears, finally nodding in understanding and giving him some hope.

“My mind hasn’t fully been my own for years,” Ben added, hating to say those words aloud despite the truth of them. “There were moments I thought for myself of course, but not to the extent I am now. I need to do what I know is right, but it would mean everything if I knew you were there at my side when I did.”

A few fresh tears slid down Rey’s cheeks but she took a deep breath and gave him a small smile that instantly warmed him

“Yes, of course I’ll be at your side,” she whispered, her voice just a touch unsteady. 

Overwhelmed with relief, Ben lifted Rey off her feet, enveloping her in an embrace and kiss that they lost themselves in for a few blissful moments. When he finally set her down, he pressed his forehead against hers as they both caught their breath.

“So...when do we go?” Rey asked bravely.

“Tomorrow?” he suggested, already dreading it if it meant a moment of separation for them back on Mygeeto. “May as well get it over with.” 

“I could contact Finn,” Rey offered. “Maybe if I tell them we’re coming, they can start some of the negotiations to make this easier.”

Ben nodded. “Why don’t you go contact him, then meet me back up at the Village. Then we can stop thinking about tomorrow for now, ok? We can try to just enjoy the party...enjoy our last night here together.”

He gently smoothed some of the little wisps of hair back from her face, silently swearing that this would be a happy night for her, a night to look back on fondly. He could give her that at least. 

No matter what was about to happen tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *happy sigh* ok so, yeah they’re not staying in their little love nest. But I just don’t see hiding out forever as a permanent solution for Ben. It feels unrealistic to me and it’s not the totally happy ending I’d like for them. Also, as you may have noticed, there’s only going to be one more chapter in this fic. But no worries, I’m still going to wrap it up as nicely.  
> Thanks to Lexie for taking a peek at this one and confirming the feels lol, and I’ll see you guys for the last chapter! ;)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m excited and proud to be wrapping up my first Reylo fic, and feeling pretty good about it! :D Have a read and hope you enjoy!

The Caregivers were awfully kind when it came time for them to pack up and leave the little island. They urged them to take food and additional supplies and even insisted on gifting them some little carvings. Ben mused that the Caregivers were just happy to finally be rid of them. 

The one thing that made Rey truly pause was packing up the makeshift campsite on the ground between their two huts. She stood there, staring at the now bare ground and flattened grass as if it were hallowed ground.

She felt strong arms slide around her middle and Ben’s face lean down to rest against her cheek.

“It was the first bed we shared, but it won’t be the last,” he whispered. “I promise you that. The next one might even be nicer than this.”

Rey felt his chuckle against her back and she couldn’t help laughing a little as well, despite the cloud of worry that hung over her head. 

“Come on,” he prompted gently. “Let’s get going.”

Rey, Ben, and D-O boarded the Aurora and got everything prepared for take off. There was just one thing left to do and Rey was dreading it. 

The night before, they’d agreed to contact Finn and Poe again before leaving for Mygeeto. Rey knew that she wouldn’t like what she heard even before they began to explain how their arrival would be and the events that would follow. But her friends had assured her that they would do everything in their power to make sure there was as much leniency as possible for Ben before the Galactic Republic. 

She had been grateful, but it did little to sooth her nerves.

“Finn, we’re just about ready to leave,” Rey explained once they’d connected with him. “What were you able to do so far?”

“Hey, Rey. Uh, is Ben there?” 

The hesitance in his voice instantly put her on edge.

“I’m here,” Ben replied, making his presence clear.

“Oh ok. Great. I just- I wasn’t sure if you right there or listening or-“

“You can say whatever you want, Finn,” Ben added, smirking at Rey in amusement. “You’re not gonna upset me.”

They could hear Finn release a little sigh, out of relief or nervousness they couldn’t tell.

“So, Poe and I went to the committee that’s heading the hunt for the First Order. We explained everything, just like you’d told us last night. We explained what Ben did on Exegol, the role he played and that you were only able to defeat the Emperor because he was there. We also were clear that everyone, including you Rey, believed him to be dead after that, because he’d been thrown into a pit, and that it was only later you found him on Tatooine.”

“And they know why I didn’t turn myself in right away?” Ben asked.

“We explained that you were badly injured and that you didn’t know what you’d be walking into, therefore you had to feel completely recovered before facing the Galactic Republic. Once you were fully recovered and heard of the mission to stamp out the last of the First Order, you took immediate action.”

“They know he wants to help?” Rey asked, hanging on every word.

“They do,” Finn assured her. “They’re just...hesitant.”

Rey glanced nervously at Ben.

“That’s ok,” Ben said, and Rey could tell he was keeping his tone positive. “Once I’m there I’ll be better able to show them my loyalty.”

“Right,” Finn replied.

Ben narrowed his eyes at Rey before addressing Finn again.

“And what else? Because it sounds like you’re holding something back right now.”

“So, there’s been some change of the plans we talked about before...they’re going to be waiting for you. There’s going to be a bit of a greeting party when you arrive.”

“To take me into custody, you mean?”

Finn paused.

“Yeah, basically.”

“That’s silly,” Rey jumped in, feeling her anxiety rising. “Restraints are pointless and any holding cell would be as well. If Ben wanted to get away or get anyone out of his way, he’d be perfectly capable of doing it!”

“Actually, they have a plan for that,” Finn explained, an apology in his voice already. “There’s going to be a Ysalamir.”

Rey frowned in confusion for a moment but her heart sank at the look on Ben’s face.

“What’s a ysalamir?” she asked quietly..

Ben seemed to be chewing on his words before responding, and Rey could feel the spike of anxiety in the bond. 

“They’re a reptile,” he said eventually. “They naturally can create a radius around them that neutralizes any connection to the Force. I didn’t realize that the Resistance would be able to find one so quickly, since they have gone mostly extinct.”

“No, no,” Rey shook her head, realizing what that would mean, not just for Ben. “That’s- no they can’t just do that. He’s not going to use the force to hurt anybody or do anything wrong! How are they ever going to see that if they just take away any-“

“It’s fine,” Ben cut in, his hand darting out to grab Rey’s as he spoke to both her and Finn. “They need to do whatever makes everyone feel safe. It should only be temporary, until they can trust me.”

Rey’s eyes pleaded, silently screaming at him that she wouldn’t be able to endure this. This is the one thing that would cut them off from each other entirely. The idea of not being able to feel him, to see him through their bond...especially after these past few weeks, it was unthinkable. 

“Ben…”

He turned and spoke only to her. “They’re never going to trust me if I fight against something like this. We have to let them. We have to.”

Rey held his steady gaze for a long time before finally nodding.

“So they’re going to need time to consider all the evidence,” Finn went on. “They’ll need statements from people, a lot of people. But they’re willing to do that. It seems that General Organa’s continued hope had a strong enough influence that a number of people on the council were looking at things from that perspective. The point is, there is a chance for pardon.”

Ben squeezed Rey’s hand, giving her a little smile.

A pardon was almost too much to hope for. But, maybe...

“Well then I guess we’ll see you soon. Hey, Finn?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.” Ben’s tone was audibly genuine, and Rey was sure Finn could hear it as clearly as she could. “And I’m sorry for, y’know, almost killing last year.”

Finn laughed. “Tell you what, I’ll be the first to issue you an official pardon, even if it is just on behalf of me personally. And you’re welcome.”

“Thanks, Finn,” Rey added. “We’ll see you soon.”

She ended the transmission and sighed heavily, looking back at Ben.

“You ready?”

“I am.” He smiled, shifting his fingers to link with hers. “Let’s go.”

* * *

“Rey?”

Her head jolted up from where she sat behind the cockpit. “What? What’s going on?

“We’re almost there. We’re approaching Mygeeto now,” he explained.

Rey shut her eyes again for a moment, furious at herself. She’d drifted off almost an hour ago. She never should have agreed to let him give her a break and pilot for a while. She’d just wasted part of the very limited time she had left with the man she loved.

_ The man she loved _ .

Rey looked down for a moment, then back up to the planet which was growing in size and proximity by the moment. The planet which would mean a separation for them, and for an unspecified length of time.

“Ben, I love you.”

His head whirled around, locking eyes with her at the sound of the words she hadn’t even truly planned to say out loud. Not that she was sorry.

Barely even breaking his gaze from hers, Ben halted the engines, bringing the Aurora to a holding position before standing from his seat and closing the distance between them as she stood to meet him.

They collided, instantly and fiercely clinging to each other. And Rey drank it all in with unapologetic greed. The feel of his hands engulfing her body, the solid strength of him against her chest, and the way he breathed warmth into the crook of her neck. She wanted all of it and more forever and ever. Even one day without this would test her to the limits.

Ben pulled back, cradling her face and staring back at her with an expression so full of emotion that it nearly broke her.

“Rey, I have loved you since before I even knew I was capable of it,” he murmured. “And everything about what we have makes all of this worth it. No matter what happens, this has  _ all _ been worth it.”

Instead of allowing herself to fully burst into tears, Rey took the opportunity to pull him in for a kiss. And she very deliberately set the pace; slow and passionate, as if they had all the time in the world. In fact, that’s what they were both saying rather loudly to each other through their bond, as their mouths were far too busy to do so. They were going to have all the time they needed and wanted soon enough. There would be plenty more of this and more of everything else they both wanted.

There would be a life, full and happy and meaningful.

Ben was the one to finally separate their lips, his hands now tangled in her hair. He exhaled, slow and purposefully controlled as his thumbs smoothed any escaped tears from her cheeks.

“Ok,” he finally whispered. “Whaddya say we get this done?”

Rey’s lips were still shaking but she smiled and nodded, feeling an unexpected burst of confidence and strength. A belief that they could do this. It was warm and comforting...like the sun.

Rey stepped over to the cockpit as Ben started the ship moving forward again. She called to the base, alerting them to their arrival.

“Copy that,” came the reply. “We’re expecting you. You’re clear to land.”

She was going to miss this, she thought as they neared the planet, despite her burst of hope. She would miss being just the two of them. He must have heard her loud and clear because he took her hand again as he started to bring the ship into Mygeeto’s atmosphere.

“It’s still just us, ok?” Ben whispered, giving her a reassuring nod and a look that wasn’t lost on her. “Even down there with everyone else...it’s you and me.”

Rey gave him a little nod in return, knowing he was right.

And she’d never doubt it again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So obviously I chose not to detail exactly what happens from here forward, but to me that’s a whole other story to tell. This story was just to focus on their little time together before things get crazy lol. But this still felt like a satisfying conclusion to me, so I hope you agree. It is possible that if I’m moved, at some point I’ll do a little epilogue, but for now I have some other things in the works. And one, I’m happy to say, is for Reylo!  
> Thanks for the love on this fic, and I’d love to hear from you if you’ve enjoyed the final chapter or the fic as a whole. And a big thank you again to Lexie, who has helped me And encouraged me in this leap into this new and wonderful ship. <3


End file.
